Thursday, June 22, 2006

Quasi-Rant

From time to time, people tell me, "lighten up, it's just a horse," or, "that's a lot of money for "just a horse." This is especially more difficult for me to bear since tragically losing those two horses in March. I still have nightmares and flashbacks...

They don't understand the multitude of emotions involved, the distance traveled, the endless time spent, or the extreme expense involved for "just a horse."

Some of my proudest moments involve "just a horse."

Many hours have passed and my only company was "just a horse," but I did not once feel slighted. I was honored.


Honestly, my saddest moments have been brought about by "just a horse", and in those days of darkness, the gentle touch of "just a horse" gave me comfort and reason to overcome the day. Or to keep living.


If you, too, think it's "just a horse," then you probably have little comprehension of phrases like "just a friend," "just a love," or "just a promise."


"Just a horse" breathes into my life the very essence of friendship, trust, and pure unbridled joy.


"Just a horse" generates the compassion and patience that make me a better person...makes me strive to be a better person.


Because of "just a horse" I will rise early, take long walks, and look longingly to the future.


So for me, and those like me, it's not "just a horse," but an embodiment of all the hopes and dreams of the future, the fond memories of the past, and the pure joy of the moment.


"Just a horse" brings out what's good in me and diverts my thoughts away from negativity and the worries of the day.


I hope that someday they can understand that it's not "just a horse" but the thing that gives me humanity and keeps me from being "just a girl."


So the next time you hear the phrase "just a horse" smile, because they "just" don't understand.

27 Comments:

Anonymous Joel said...

Understand. For better or worse we feel that way about our dogs. Friends routinely chide us for not wanting to leave our dogs or needing to get home to feed them, etc. The truth is we actually prefer their company (the pups) to most humans any day of the week.

10:37 AM  
Blogger brian said...

"Just A Horse"

Four hooves that prance,
beautiful eyes that dance,
soft nicker in greeting,
anticipation in meeting,
skin warm to the touch,
my friends I love much,
to saddle up and ride,
sheer joy I can't hide,
warm wind blows my hair,
creates feeling so rare,
strong bond between two,
something I always knew,
you may say but of course,
he's more than just a horse.


Thank you my love. From two.

10:56 AM  
Anonymous neva (aka: puppytoes) said...

i see my husband (joel) beat me to the comment punch today! and what he says is true. for us, a perfect day is one spent together, surrounded by our pups! the thought of losing one of our precious dogs is one i can't bear.

needless to say, i cried while reading this, because i see and feel the depths of your love for these magnificent animals and the pain in having lost even one.

this was a beautiful post, dear cowgirl... and i'm so sorry to know of your losses. xox

12:51 PM  
Blogger O Ceallaigh said...

Cowgirl - I'm not a horse person, but Wendy, a gal that does work for me, is. We reach.

Every once in awhile over at Bloggerparty, a poke calls himself "lostcowboy" posts from time to time. Has similar things to say about horses. Might wish to pay him a call.

And, about that "not looking like a mule". Thanks for the earworm. I think.

1:03 PM  
Blogger BarnGoddess said...

cowgirl-we are two people who regard horses the same way. It absolutely bristles me when people say 'it's just a horse'. They have no clue. Ive always lived my life living and breathing horses, literally, its the one big reason I moved to Okla in '89.People who have never had a connection to horses tend to make ignorant comments like that, when I was younger it made me see red....these days I only surround myself with horse-people....I am much happier now!

1:33 PM  
Blogger brian said...

Going home now. Have a great night.

2:30 PM  
Blogger Rude1 said...

...sigh...

Who can top that? yet again, your words, and ability to put them together, is why I stop by whenever I can. Thanks doll, you ROCK!

4:22 PM  
Blogger Jamie Dawn said...

I have not been around horses much at all in my life.
I rode one once many years ago in Mexico before I had kids. Her name was Rosella. I remember that my backside was mighty sore after riding all day, but my memories of that day are good ones.
I enjoyed your post.
My high speed internet got fixed today - a day earlier than expected - so I have some leftover anti-bitch gel should you need it. I will be keeping some on hand, just in case I face more internet woes in the future. :)

5:14 PM  
Blogger liberal army wife said...

just a horse... might as well say just a dog.... just a cat.... just a friend...

anyone who says that, is an ass. pure and simple An ass. (No, not the 4 legged kind either) the kind you sit upon, wipe, put underwear on.....

LAW

5:30 PM  
Blogger SGT Lori said...

sounds almost like "just a soldier".... Hang in there. Those that understand REALLY care and don't offer trite little sayings.

5:37 PM  
Blogger Kyahgirl said...

Sorry you had to listen to that crap CG. Animals bring a whole other dimension to our love lives don't they? I'm just grateful for that and I'm sure you are too. Feel sorry for those without a clue.

6:24 PM  
Blogger G said...

Really nicely put. Nothing irks me more than such platitudes. Dope.

6:58 PM  
Blogger Minka said...

I so toatlly understand your sentiment. I couldnæt possibly imagine my life without horse in it.

There is such a connenction you can build and if you have once tried and achieved trust, well...you can never go back on that feeling.
The touch, the trust and the combined strength is a love-story so special and honest, and rare to find.

7:01 AM  
Anonymous pia said...

That is truly beautiful

In NY the horses that "draw" the carriages used to be allowed to go out in all weather.

Now they can't go out in weather over 90--but that's not enough, and I can't stand passing them because most look so sick and not taken care

The ASPCA does what it can, but...and I've never heard of PETA champioining and to carriage rides or more regulations

7:51 AM  
Blogger Miz BoheMia said...

No they don't. As a scrawny, skinny, physically fragile little girl, I used to wonder off, far from home.

I came upon a horse once, which I later learned was called Lucero. I thought he was tied down but later found out he wasn't. He towered above me. He sensed my fragility and was gentle with me. He'd walk beside me as I just talked to him and told him of my troubles. I always had an apple or two for him. I am 31 now and still remember him and love him so!

Later in life, I met a pregnant mare. She was amazing and rolled around in front of me when she let down her guard and relaxed. Later, she introduced me to her newborn when I dropped by her field to visit her.

In Seattle I befriended another horse who, upon catching a glimpse of me from the distance, would come galloping to see me and nuzzle me with his face.

I love them all.

And though there may be many "firsts" I don't remember, I will always remember the name of the first and only horse I ever rode... Sandokan!

So yeah, I am with you my sistah and you just love them away and screw those lost sould that just don't get it!

10:05 AM  
Blogger Buffy said...

Wow.

11:33 AM  
Anonymous pia said...

Just wanted to say that you'll have to ask the dawg what litter you're in. I stopped counting

4:21 PM  
Anonymous cooper said...

awwwww, tis true I imagine, what you say.

6:48 PM  
Anonymous shayna said...

Animals are not "just animals"... my dog isn't "just a dog"... I understand where you are coming from...

7:12 PM  
Blogger ~ good girl ~ said...

I'm this way with my dogs. Always have had them, from age 6 onwards.

One of the best posts I've read in a while. Simple and straight to it. I felt so teary :-(

I hope you''ll feel better soon. The dogs have a Rainbow bridge. Not sure what horses have but it must be the same wonderful place.

GG

6:59 AM  
Blogger Doug said...

You won't hear me say "Just a horse." Although I had family who worked for horse breeders in KY and I did think a quarter-million was a lot of money. First rate cowhorses rarely cost a grand when I used them.

10:47 AM  
Blogger Sar said...

That was beautifully written Cowgirl. I happen to share your feeling about animals in general. People think I'm nuts when I say fishing for sport is cruel, but I do.

Btw, write me when you get a chance sweetie.

2:20 PM  
Blogger Pixie said...

Damn.

I didn't expect this.

Last summer Gabfabulous went to a birthday party... one of the neighbors brought his pony "Bally" over with a buggy hooked up - to give the kids buggy rides. Gab was scared to death, but I went with her; 1/4 of a mile down the road I inquired as to how long Bally had been working on the buggy - he seemed very distracted and uncomfortable and I was becoming increasingly nervous. Something felt wrong. Dead wrong.

"First time ever" the guy replied.

HOLY MOTHER OF GODS.

About this time, we were pulling back onto the frontage road in front of the house.

I jumped down and pulled Gab off ... the other children wanted to go for another ride and they were off before I could speak with the birthday girl's parents.

Gone for about 5 minutes, the children came running up the road screaming the buggy had crashed. I took off across the desert with the birthday girl's dad to find the buggy in a wash tangled in prickly pear and cholla... and Bally in the middle of the road... with a wooden pole (part of the buggy hitch) protruding from his chest. He had spooked and dumped the buggy; been impaled by the pole. The foaming blood coming from his chest said it all - punctured heart... punctured lung...

... the look in that beautiful little man's (horses) eyes as he lay there dying (covered in goosebumps as I finally tell this story) will haunt me for the rest of my life.

While I understand the driver had faith in Bally, he didn't have an ounce or respect for him. He attached him to an unfamiliar buggy full of unfamiliar, noisy 5 year olds and took him down roads he was unfamiliar with, without a second thought.

...that was the epitome of cruelty.

After tarping and pulling Bally back to the barn, I put my arm around the man's shoulder and offered my condolences. His response?

Hell, he was just a horse.

And now I think I shall throw up.

I love you girl.

11:50 PM  
Blogger ~ good girl ~ said...

Oh Pixie,

That's so sad. SO TERRIBLY SAD. I feel angry too. Bally must have been so frightened.

Argh.

GG

7:26 AM  
Blogger Bridget Laine said...

It is definitely a concept that one either "gets" or they don't.

I personally know that if I hadn't had my horse to get me through becoming a widow two years ago, I would have gone insane. Prior to my husband's car accident, Alibi and I hated each other with a bloody passion. As irony would have it, that damn stallion was the only thing to make it alive through the wreck. His rehabilitaion at my hands was just as much for fixing me as it was him.

Thank you for posting this. You have verbalized what I feel every horse owner has always felt. This is the first time I have visited your blog, but I will definitely be back!

9:23 PM  
Blogger Michael said...

Horses are awesome. I used to work with horses, and they do leave an impression on you. By the way, its good to see more women in the blogosphere, I love the title of your blog!

By the way, my name is Michael, and I am the editor of Western World Politics, an un-apologetically
pro-American and pro-freedom blog. We have recently moved to the new address of;

http://thewwp.blogspot.com

Please feel free to check us out sometime, as we are keen to build up links and working relationships with other like minded bloggers. If you link to us, we return the favour! If you wish to contact me, please feel free to do so at the e-mail address on the blog.

Regards

Michael, Editor Western World Politics

6:15 AM  
Blogger liberal army wife said...

and as for Bally's owner... shooting him would have been wrong how? Not so much...
LAW~

6:16 PM  

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