Thursday, May 18, 2006

Not Wearing Black To This One

Tomorrow I have a funeral to attend for a fallen soldier. Just after welcoming home the majority of the troops that I had known in Iraq...after thoughts ran through my head that no one had died there that I personally knew.

But now I can no longer say that.

Fears for my high school best friend's husband and my personal Ethan have been revisited...although I know they are doing their best to come back in September.

There are others that I know deployed...and I pray for their safe return.

My daily blog reading has left me still thinking...which it usually does. But this time it's something I relate to on a personal level. With this, pia has again made me step back and think about the world beyond Iraq, gas prices, Presidential disapproval ratings, taking my turn guarding the border, and media infused crap.

Parents attempting to live their lives and leave a legacy that isn't theirs through children disappoint me. I have been, excuse me, still am one of those children...and will never be one of those parents.

I believe we live our own legacy. Touching the lives of the children I am blessed with, no matter whose DNA they share, is what I consider as a part of my legacy. What they do with their own lives is their legacy. You are your own legacy...however, I strongly believe that influencing the future can be a part of your legacy.

Every child I have given riding lessons to, every challenged person I have watched heal through the touch of a horse...that is my legacy. And I am just getting started.

I promised my friend I would give his horse crazy kid riding lessons this summer, and damn it, if I have to go pick her up and take her home, she is going to ride. Her daddy finally decided she was responsible enough...and was hoping to buy her a horse for Christmas if she proved she was worthy. And if she is, I will bend over backwards to figure out a way to make that happen. Because her daddy died fighting to protect the future, leaving his own legacy.

And this makes four.


So that's where Hoffa went? I knew he was last seen at the Machus Red Fox restaurant, but now the FBI is digging around a horse farm, Hidden Dreams Farm, for him.


Blogger brian said...


I must have been thinking about you, I wrote a poem last night, "Blinded by Tears". Seeing as you are going to the real deal tomorrow, my thoughts and prayers are with you. I never knew about the earings.
I will be with you.

10:12 AM  
Anonymous shayna said...

I like this look chica...


It's hard losing someone you know... specially those fighting... I have lost two friends... and do hope and pray every day that Ethan returns safely...

Take care...

11:01 AM  
Blogger BarnGoddess said...

your a good woman cowgirl and a person who can make a difference, the little girl you spoke of will always remember you, I hope her lessons go well. When I lost my mom at 11 yo, I had a horsey friend who often rode with me and just did general horsey stuff, she understood my pain and I didnt feel alone or strange because I sought solace in my horse, Patches.

11:28 AM  
Blogger Jake said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

11:31 AM  
Blogger Cowgirl said...

Brian, thanks.

Shayna!!!!! I like the look too...but are you refering to the earrings or the blog? ;)

I pray so too.

Barngoddess, hardly anyone ever calls me a woman...I am totally stuck on that. Even in real life, I am but a girl.

I am going to do what I can. She deserves that.

12:27 PM  
Blogger Kyahgirl said...

I'm sorry Cowgirl. You're a good friend.

I'm impressed with your commitment to your students.

So happy to see the trademark cowgirl silhouette and rider back!! Its starting to look like home around here :-)

12:28 PM  
Blogger Cowgirl said...

Kyahgirl, I try my darndest to be a good friend.

Every new student was a new opportunity to make a difference, no matter how small.

Horses are a wonderful medium. And great self esteem builders.

I'm kinda partial to my silhouette. ;)

12:37 PM  
Blogger brian said...

Would you like me to call you women?

Any ideas on the my blog problem?

12:47 PM  
Blogger Cowgirl said...

Naw, Brian you can call me girl. But I am sure you understand what I meant. ;)

I'm emailing you.

12:54 PM  
Blogger brian said...

Is that girl or guuuurlll.

1:00 PM  
Anonymous ginah said...

Just want to extend my sympathies -it must be very tough when you are not just reading statistics, but actually knowing them. I, too, read Pia's post today which had me in a ponderous mood throughout. On a sidenote, I see that you teach children hb riding - something that I wanted to look into for my little guy with some sensory stuff going on - perhaps I'll e-mail you at some point for info if you don't mind?

1:06 PM  
Blogger Cowgirl said...

Brian, its either.

Ginah, email or IM me anytime. I like breaking the monotony. And I know lots of horse ppl all over the country.

Thank you, and living it certainly brings it home.

1:15 PM  
Blogger The ZenFo Pro said...

I know there were quite a few folks I grew up with who ended up in Afghanistan and then Iraq. It's hard road, always.

Anything ya need, give me a holler.

1:41 PM  
Anonymous pia said...

I'm so sorry. Words always feel foolish when acknowledging losses like that--from the commenter not the poster--so if you need an ear, or a computer screen...

3:00 PM  
Anonymous cooper said...

That is sad and I'll be thinking of you.
I personally know no one in Iraq. I merely know people who know people. I have heard, since I have been back here that there are several people that were in my class that are there or are going, I don't really know them though. That would be hard for me.

I can't fanthom it.

You are a good woman.

8:23 PM  
Blogger Miz BoheMia said...

I am sorry to hear of the loss Cowgirl! It kills me... such brave people...

I love your new look by the way...

I hope these days are not too tough and that you pull through it all well my friend! Many kisses!

1:38 AM  
Blogger brian said...


Just wanted to let you know that I wrote a poem for you based on your new banner. I will e-mail you tonight.

7:37 AM  
Blogger Manchego said...

Thinking of you today, cowgirl.

8:37 AM  
Blogger Pixie said...

You're a popular (Cow)girl. I wrote a poem about you last night too...

Will send it.




5:05 PM  
Blogger Politics of a Patriot said...

I was just thinking what an excellent post this was, then I got to the line about that little girl's daddy dying and it broke my heart.

Keep up the good work. What you are doing will definitely leave a wonderful legacy and is priceless.

Semper Fi.

8:12 PM  

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