Friday, March 03, 2006

The Good Doctor

Come A Little Closer Baby by Dierks Bentley is playing right now. How appropriate.
Come a little closer, baby
I feel like lettin' go
Of everything that stands between us
And the love we used to know
I wanna touch you like a cleansing rain
Let it wash all the hurt away
So come a little closer baby
I feel like lettin' go
I want to thank everyone for their support. It is amazing how so many awesome people pepper the country side.

Here goes the much awaited ending to As The Sawdust Turns. I tried to finish it last night (early this morning really), but I was too tired. Or something. Besides, this last part deserved more thought than my ramblings.

As I sometimes do when I go out at night, I left my backdoor unlocked. Ah, the glory of living in the country. It makes it a lot easier than fumbling with my keys. Besides, I doubt many people would get past my dog (who was THRILLED to see Travis, even after all of these years).

After Travis carried me in the house, placed me on the couch, and kissed my forehead, he headed into my kitchen.

"Where's the coffee?" he asked me, filling up the pot with water. Always the gentlemen. I got up, handed him the coffee out of the freezer, and started towards the dishwasher for two coffee cups.

"Sorry. I couldn't help myself. I hope I didn't..." he looked at me nervously, as I interrupted him.

"Overstep your boundary?" I handed him the coffee cups. "No. It was nice, I'm just a little shocked." And I was. Scared shitless really. I had to keep reminding myself to breathe. I am not supposed to be an emotional person, and I was standing there next to this gorgeous man - in emotional overdrive. But of course I had to play it cool.

"Shocked? That we ran into each other after all of these years, or because there is still something between us. I felt it - you can't tell me that you didn't..." he looked at me with his piercing eyes while we were praying to the coffee maker God. We locked eyes for a second, and then I had to look away - I didn't know what to say or how to say it. So I split what was in the coffee pot between us and sat down at the kitchen table.

He sat down across from me, took a sip of his coffee, and just looked at me.

"What?" (I am way too defensive sometimes).

"You have" He reached over and touched my right cheek. This moment was in slow motion. Caressing my cheek. My heart was going to pound right out of my chest. A shiver went down my spine. Damn, I hate how that happens.

That touch did it, I couldn't help it. I spilled."I don't want to have you back in my life, just to see you leave as quickly as you came in. My heart can't take it. What do are we doing? How can we make this work? We are hours apart, I am trying to regroup, and you are busy with your last year of medical school. How can we do this? What are we doing? Damn it Travis, why now!? Why show up now!" I looked at him like he contained the answers to the world. He is used to, and likes, the personality that explodes out of this cowgirl. Travis just smiled.

He stood up, grabbed the coffee pot, and refilled our cups. "We have all night to talk about it, and the rest of ours lives to figure it out." Those words confirmed it, I was in trouble. I couldn't run away from it now, my legs had officially turned to jello.

We stayed up talking for about another hour, and I couldn't help but start to yawn. It had been a long night, but we had came to an agreement that we were going to try to figure out a way to see each other. We were going to try to make this work, whatever "this" is. He will be finished with school at the end of this semester, and taking a job about 45 minutes from our hometown. We'll see how things pan out, and take it day by day. But I was getting tired, and tired of talking.

"Trav, I am heading to bed," putting my cup in the sink. "I can take you home, or you can just come to bed with me." Did I just say that. Damn. I swear, when I do something its all or nothing. What can I say, I'm weak.

I'm going to stop the story here. I will leave it to your imagination. What happened was so amazingly beautiful. The most perfect experience I have had in my 24 almost 25 years. I didn't think I would ever feel like this. I didn't think that I deserved to feel - well, I don't know how to describe it. Maybe there aren't any words for it. But I am sure some of you know what I am talking about.

We went out for breakfast after that night (I have already heard gossip about it, lol), and I was in shock. I could -gasp - marry this man.


Anonymous Shelleigh (aka Pie Shell) said...

Words would only simplify, sister. My god, my god, I am so excited and pleased for you... and for the very lucky Dr. T.

Have a wonderful time tonight - miles don't matter as long as the lines of communication stay open. Please remember this. Important.

Happy, happy girl.


4:39 PM  
Blogger Cowgirl said...

I have been on cloud nine ever since that night.

I still can't believe he went to Stanford, but I am floored that he chose medical school. He wants to go into pediatrics....

I always figured he would do something good, but this goes above and beyond anything I could concieve of him wanting to do. But I guess we all can be full of surprises.

4:42 PM  
Anonymous shayna said...

Glad to hear that things are working out... working out! ;)

7:14 PM  

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